The fear of reaching out

The fear of reaching out

Shame is an addict’s worst enemy. It leaves us pushing away the very people best poised to help us. Shame is LOUD and it’s amplified by the disease telling us that rejection is inevitable and that trusting others will only lead to heartache.

Ambivalence is a barrier to recovery

Ambivalence is a barrier to recovery

There’s a fine line between, “I don’t know if I want this” and “I’m afraid of this.” That line is imperceptible when we’re on the fence.

Stop shaming yourself during quarantine

Stop shaming yourself during quarantine

The idea that we’re not doing enough is tied to the belief that we are not enough. A dear friend of mine in the field would often say, “We’re not really human beings because we don’t know how to just be. We’re human doers because we derive our worth from what we do.”

How Covid-19 will impact addiction

How Covid-19 will impact addiction

The biggest difference between a pandemic and an epidemic is that the former is contagious and the latter is not. The biggest similarity is that we knowingly place certain members of our culture at risk of developing both.

Alcohol, Zoom, and the Pandemic

Alcohol, Zoom, and the Pandemic

“While I’m in a meeting, my disease is outside doing pushups.” We know this is true – we also know that the disease is not “out there” it’s inside of us and seeking to undermine us at all times.

How to stop worrying

How to stop worrying

If we’re going to overcome worrying; the first step is to differentiate it from concern. To be concerned is a healthy exercise of empathy and compassion. Worrying is waiting for the other shoe to drop and telling yourself you’ll feel relieved if it doesn’t and prepared if it does.

The disease will use a pandemic

Staying home, whether self-imposed or by government ordered, offers us the opportunity to invest in family relations and enjoy more “quality time.” Even in the healthiest of families, cabin fever eventually sets in. For those of us in families that are struggling, quarantine may feel especially hard.

Quarantine & Family Dysfunction

Quarantine & Family Dysfunction

Staying home, whether self-imposed or by government ordered, offers us the opportunity to invest in family relations and enjoy more “quality time.” Even in the healthiest of families, cabin fever eventually sets in. For those of us in families that are struggling, quarantine may feel especially hard.

Covid-19 and recovery options

Covid-19 and recovery options

In the midst of this crisis, folks are losing access to countless services. For people like me, the absence of in person addiction services and 12 step meetings puts us at heightened levels of risk and anxiety.

Why your brain is 100mph and what to do about it

Why your brain is 100mph and what to do about it

All of us whose brains go 100mph engage in addictive thinking – the black and white, all or nothing, now or never mindset. Our minds get hijacked by urges, cravings and shiny distractions that distance us from ourselves. We strive to attain – whether it’s for the next fix, the next conquest, or even in achieving our recovery goals, our approach is largely the same: